Dog Days: Day 1

We have a dog!!!

My friend Des's sweet little boy has severe asthma and the dog was making it much, much worse. The doctor told her it was best to rehome the dog for the sake of his breathing and I saw her post his picture on a few facebook pages.

We had already planned to foster a rescue dog and figured now was a good time. I contacted her to let her know we were interested but to let him go to anyone who could get there before me. A few people interested couldn't take him and so he was still around. I wanted to make sure we were both meeting him at the same time and at his own house. I had talked with her before about him and she was very forthcoming with the pros and the cons of his personality. Great with kids and dogs, stays in the crate, only like soft toys. 

Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer, is a staple at this house so we knew we had to take him for a walk. Living on base, Des's house was the perfect location. As soon as we stepped onto the sidewalk kids went whizzing by, strange noises came from bikes or scooters, cars drove right next to us and through it all  he was unfazed. Great.

I made sure DH was there with me the first time I met the dog. He was rescued during a deployment so there was no way to know if his skittishness around males was from a past abuse or just confusion as to why a strange male was suddenly allowed in the house-or a combo of both. I wanted DH to be there to make sure the dog was ok with him. Any trouble and he was a no-go; he seemed perfectly fine.

He came with a plastic crate and we were told he sometimes had to be locked out of it so he would be around the family and not inside of it. None of our dogs growing up ever had a crate so it's my plan to get rid of that. We shall see.

The crate went into the truck and Des's DH picked up the dog and put him in; he apparently freaks out if not in the crate for car rides.

Getting him home was fine, he was quiet, and we couldn't tell much more because the crate is opaque.  To cement the relationship between dog and man, as we were told he follows Des around (and therefore probably me also), I had DH take him for a walk while I unpacked his stuff from the truck. It was at this time I managed to lose control of the full dog bowl and toss it all over the inside of the truck and out on to the driveway. What a mess. At least it was dry. The dog did not want to walk without me (aw!) but he did just fine.

In the house he checked out the lower level. We kept the leash on him just in case, an idea from the Dog Whisperer. Using the leash we were able to convince Tanner to go upstairs and check out the rooms up there but he headed right back down stairs, where we unhooked the leash. I knew to limit him because nervous dogs can be overwhelmed with so much space.

He spent most of the time in the crate. By the time we got him home it was dark out and we thought nothing of letting him out into the backyard. On base they have a good space of grass or rock. Here was have three steps and then a pool. He went right out the door and into the pool on the wading deck, up to his ears. Poor thing, it was cold out.

I yelled into the house for DH, who was upstairs, to bring towels. I dried off the dog with lots of rubbing but managed to miss his neck which became obvious when inside, the dog kept putting his head on my lap, wetting my pants.

He is inquisitive but so skittish. I did notice Tanner searched for DH when went out to pull the truck into the garage. Definitely a good sign.

Deployment Coffee

Guest Blog: Deployment Coffee

 Posted by Guest Blogger on April 4, 2013 at 16:00

(picture published on article page of Blog Brigade)

My publishing credit: credited as “Guest Blogger” “Christina”
Published by Blog Brigade of Military OneSource on April 4, 2013 , in Deployment 

http://blog-brigade.militaryonesource.mil/blogs/separation-deployment/

Blogger Biography: Christina is a proud war bride, military 
“dependent,” writer and volunteer. She met her husband 

while working two jobs to pay her student loans and stay afloat. 
He stuck with her despite the long and crazy hours away from 
each other and so began her experience with the military. 
Scrapping the wedding for a long and dangerous deployment, 
she fully embraced being a military spouse. Christina reaches 
out to all available networks to learn and take advantage of 
what the military has to offer its family. Learning the ropes is
 tough, but she knows she has help.

There is always one thing I consistently do when my husband deploys 
or goes TDY. I would like to say it’s get a massage or a facial,
 but I just never find the time or budget for those things.

What does fit in my budget and what I can sneak a few moments for 
is coffee. Forever ago, I found one specific flavor from a specific 
brand that I just could not get enough of. For years I could only 
find it during the holidays and then it was gone! I refused to open 
the last package for everyday use. Coffee is coffee to my husband.
 (His fishing or car stuff is another matter entirely.) For me, this 
coffee is like his special stuff. He just laughs at me when I try to
 explain it.

It’s even more special because when I finally found it he was 
deployed. I would come home to a dark, cold house and turn on 
the coffee pot for just a cup or two. That gave me enough time
to change out of my work clothes or uniform and into yoga pants,
a sweatshirt and some fuzzy socks. I would turn up the heat and
get dinner started. If it was just me, I enjoyed the coffee while
cooking. If the house was abuzz with activity, I saved it for when 
beds were tucked and guests had taken their leave. I would settle 
on the couch and listen to some music or just collapse into the 
nearest chair for a few minutes of peace.

I would indulge in the smell of the coffee as it wafted up from 
the cup in white curls, savoring each taste as it rolled over my 
tongue, absorbing the warmth of the cup in both hands before 
returning to life, laundry, cleaning, bills or returning missed 
phone calls. When I found it, I couldn't help but send a happy
 little email to my husband. After that, every time we talked 
or emailed until he came home, he would ask if I had my special 
coffee as a clue to how my day went.

Now it’s one of our little jokes. Since I can get it fairly 
regularly, I only buy a few boxes, which stay hidden in the 
pantry waiting for the next deployment or TDY. And they only 
come out then. Once he even came back with two special mugs 
for my “Deployment Coffee.”

What is the special thing you do for yourself during a deployment
or TDY?

Deployed During The Holidays

(picture published on article page of Blog Bridge)

Deployed During The Holidays

My publishing credit: credited as “Guest Blogger” “Christina”

Published by Blog Brigade of Military OneSource on December 22, 2012, in Holidays,  Military Life by Guest Blog.

http://blog-brigade.militaryonesource.mil/2012/12/22/deployed-during-the-holidays/

Blogger Biography: Christina is a proud war bride, military “dependent,” writer and volunteer. She met her husband while working two jobs to pay her student loans and stay afloat. He stuck with her despite the long and crazy hours away from each other and so began her experience with the military. Scrapping the wedding for a long and dangerous deployment, she fully embraced being a military spouse. Christina reaches out to all available networks to learn and take advantage of what the military has to offer its family. Learning the ropes is tough, but she knows she has help.

He always seems to be gone at the holidays. Even when he was here, travel killed at least two days, and then the recovery and cleaning or laundry took another two. So we ended up staying home more often than not. Let me describe to you what our past holiday seasons have looked like and what I do when he’s gone.

As a joke, my mother bought me a table top silver tree for which I have found tiny ornaments. That goes on an outdoor “bar style” table we keep inside. I cover the base with ancient towels from my grandmother. The holiday scene depicted is a bit more horror than jolly, but it helps us to remember that traditions and meanings change through times and experience. If we do exchange presents, they are piled near the tree on the table, on the bar stools and on the floor beneath. If he is gone, I get the care package together and take a picture of the open box with the tree. Every year we debate getting a life size tree, but now this tiny one and its joke are part of our tradition. Not to mention it’s easier for me to set up and decorate alone.

Presents are usually opened after dinner while we relax, if we are home and together, that is. If he isn’t home, he and I don’t exchange gifts. But I always buy him something little, usually silly, and wrap it. One year he was able to send me a card.

I like holiday music. He can’t stand hearing the same song sung the same way repeated over and over again. Matter of fact, when he is gone, he likes that he can’t hear one song playing every moment of the day. So our compromise is a wide and varied selection of holiday music from traditional to gospel, to chant to punk, to country to selections from all over the world. The music can be on when I am signing my cards that will go overseas to our troops, to the hospitals nursing our wounded, and to our family and friends. When he is not here and we have no family close enough, it’s on 24/7 to drown out the loneliness.

When we met I had never seen the National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. It just was not my type of humor, but he loves it. He will call and I can tell him where I am in the movie and he can quote the next few lines. When he is gone, watching it is a way for me to connect across the hundreds of miles between us.

He grew up with ham and turkey. I grew up with turkey or steak. So if he is home we decide on the meat. If it’s turkey, the newest tradition is to deep fry it outside, regardless of how cold it is. Sides include pierogies, kapusta, collard greens, sweet potatoes with brown sugar, deviled eggs, squash with butter and salad. Breakfast varies; we usually splurge on cinnamon rolls and get a start on the deviled eggs. When he’s away, I still do the cinnamon rolls.

And we always have matzo ball soup. I picked that up from having Passover Seder with a friend’s family back in high school. It was delicious and fun to make. When we are together for the holidays, I always have a head cold, never fails. So the chicken soup is a help, but far more importantly, my husband is the one stuck making it. Unsurprisingly, it always turns out far more delicious when his practiced hands are in control. Mine just does not stack up anymore. The fact that cooking this has moved from me to him is one of our favorite traditions. He won’t even let me touch it.

One year it was just pasta with tomato sauce. That is all I had that wasn’t frozen. I will always remember it because we were together that year and it wasn’t planned. That was an amazing gift. If he’s gone for the holidays, he will inevitably not make it home for New Year’s Day either. I will go to every holiday event they have on base when he is not here. Actually, it doesn’t have to be around the holiday; I still do it. No point in being alone when you are lonely. When we don’t live near enough to family, I snuggle up on the couch to watch TV and wait for him to finish his shift and sit in line to try to call home.

It’s not the tree or the food, per se, that makes us look forward to the holidays. Whether we are together or apart, for us it’s the “remember when.” Most of our traditions started by accident, cobbled together based on time, distance, budget and circumstance. We came from very different backgrounds and have lived in a wide range of states. The important thing is that we made the holiday our own. So when he is able to call home, after the news that the care package still hasn’t made it there, when we have exhausted everything new that happened since our last communication, one of us will say “remember when,” and we celebrate the holiday together, bridging the distance and the time between us.

Every Light in the House is On

(uncredited picture published on article page of SpouseBUZZ)


Every Light In The House Is On


My publishing credit: credited as “Guest Blogger” “Christina” (see bio below) (I am going to frame my acceptance email!)

Published by SpouseBUZZ of Military. com on November 30, 2012, in Deployment, Military Life by Guest Bloggers.

Everyone has weird quirks, some are weirder than others. One of my biggest quirks, which hurts in the pocketbook, is leaving our holiday lights on all night long. I’m talking 5 p.m to 5 a.m.; our house can probably be seen from space when it’s decked out for the holidays.

My husband sees those lights and he sees dollar signs.  He thinks winter is a time when we can recoup from the languid, unbearable Florida summers of non-stop air conditioning.

I see those lights and see comfort during long deployment months — something that is vital at a time when, traditionally, families are coming together, not being split asunder. While our military operations abroad might be drawing to a close, I will continue to fight this battle at home.

I fight the good fight with Christmas lights. Because I was alone during our first Christmas as a married couple. It was hard to come home and destress about work or traffic to no one. As many spouses know, talking out loud can sometimes make the room seem so much more … empty.

Due to the nature of the mission I could talk to my husband only about once a month.  I was holding my breath in dread, weeks on end with every news report that came out. I never knew how my husband would be described if his time was up. Would it be just a number of casualties, would they mention his country of origin, his branch of service, his rank, his age, his name?

I was most assuredly jealous of my fellow spouses who complained that they couldn’t deal with the multiple calls a day from over there:  doesn’t he/she understand?

Oh, I understood the need to make those calls; I would be the one calling every other hour if I was over there. So much for being the strong, independent one.

To fill the void in the hours after my solitary dinner and before report-time for work the next day, I went out the door of what had become my narrow life and into the greater world to search for the light. Holiday lights.

Sometimes I bundled up and walked around the neighborhoods. Other times I drove around to the more affluent areas and basked in glory and appreciation for the lengths these people went to: single color, multicolored, flashing, strobe, ropes, net lights, minimalist, circus-worthy, wreaths, vehicles, characters, deer, polar bears, menorahs of all sizes, colors, and quantities, lighted fake palm trees, manger scenes of various sizes, cultures, and ethnicities, toy soldiers and purple hippopotami.

I was especially thankful, and made the point to silently thank, each and every time, those who left their lights on all night. Some were surely forgotten, others, it seemed, left them on just for me. Perhaps they actually did.

So last year I was dead-set on leaving my lights on all night long. One night, my husband and I had another round about why the lights needed to be on even after we had gone to bed and why we couldn’t take them down until the end of January. I stepped outside to enjoy my lights. I saw the two candles I had placed in the windows–part of that age old sign of welcome–were not lit.

I wondered if I could replace them without my husband noticing. Because I will leave the lights on for that one person who may be searching for solace and healing the wound of the missing other.

Christina is a proud war bride, military “dependent,” writer,and volunteer. She met her husband while working two jobs and he stuck with the despite the long and crazy hours away from each other. And so began her experience with the military. Scrapping the wedding for a long and dangerous deployment, she fully embraced being a military spouse. Christina reaches out to all available networks to learn and take advantage of what the military has to offer its family.

Read more: http://spousebuzz.com/blog/2012/11/every-light-in-the-house-is-on.html#ixzz2FAZTUC4q
SpouseBUZZ.com

Spouse to Spouse: Never Alone In The Military

Spouse to Spouse: Never Alone In The Military

Christina M. Callisto

Freelance Writer
Published in Military Voice & Community News March/April edition 2010 and the Town Crier

After three years of dating, as a brand new military spouse at age 26, with jobs at Eglin and Hurlburt, I thought I was prepared for my husband’s first deployment. Boy, was I wrong! Seven months, no big deal…until the loneliness set in. When you aren’t used to it and are forced into it, silence is not golden, it’s deafening.

A friend introduced me to the Emerald Coast Writers group, a non-profit consortium of writers of all skill levels, abilities, and genres in this area. Members are retired, young moms, middle-aged dads, homemakers, snowbirds, and military, both active duty and retired. Some are high school grads, others have a bachelor’s degree, a master’s, and at least one has a PhD yet they are all equal in their common interest: writing.

Through ECW I was put in touch with author Vicki Hinze, spouse to a former Special Ops officer. I was so excited to contact someone who knew what I was going through and survived it! I had seen her books in the library but never knew she shopped at the same stores that I do. We chatted on the phone and through email; she was so welcoming.

I learned that her successful writing career, over 20 novels published with a contract for three more, started when her husband PCSed to follow AFSOC from Scott AFB to Hurlburt. Like many spouses, she stayed behind to sell the house, let the kids finish the school year, and she continued working her full-time job (a blessing many of us struggle towards). With the stress of juggling kids’ activities, work demands, and preparing the house for open-house showings all by herself, writing became her me-time outlet. By working late nights and getting up in the wee hours before dawn, Hinze finished her first book in four months–one month shy of the family moving to the new base.

Although seemingly “unqualified” to be an author, she was undeterred. Writing helped her through the loneliness and anxiety of another military PCS and move. These military life trials had colored her experience and allowed her to reach out to other spouses and service members through her books. I still was not convinced she was the woman next door who would say hello while watering her plants. That is, until I heard the following story.

Hinze’s military-themed writing began in 1994 during a trip to the commissary. While grabbing items off the shelf to fill her cabinets she overheard a young couple debating between buying a jar of peanut butter and a can of tuna; purchasing both was not an option for their budget. Stunned, disgusted at the forced choice on food, and outraged that the heroes both active and on the homefront would need to go without basic necessities let alone the comforts many take for granted, Hinze called her editor and scrapped her current contract for a novel with a military-theme revolving around women. Her publisher agreed and fully supported the change. Her successive books dealt with active-duty service members, custody battles and divorce, romance, biological warfare, TDYs, alcoholism, deployments, risks, and the varied dangers inherent in service. Hinze’s single point in all of this was not to sell books, although that was a plus. It was to help the general public see that these hardships exist and understand that military families face specific stresses and dangers every day. This is what made Vicki Hinze a real person, a neighbor, a mom, a spouse, in my eyes.

She used her strength to bring awareness to a much ignored aspect of life, of my new life. She has used a number of pen names for different book series, but when it came to her twelve (so far) military books, no other name but her own felt acceptable. Hinze was on a personal mission and she wanted to stand behind the things expressed and to be an active advocate in the struggle to raise awareness on the concerns and welfare of military families. My new family.

Since I was very young, I’ve moved around quite a bit. A job search brought me to this area, thanks to the bases’ missions. Hinze’s family moved from Mississippi to California to Illinois and finally to Florida. She hailed from New Orleans, Louisiana while her husband was and is a Texan at heart. She confided to me that the varied cultures and lifestyles both of her own family and that of the wider military family helped to broaden her perspective. All of this helped expand her insight and creativity and aided in building relatable, empathetic characters.

After learning all this in bits and pieces, I couldn’t wait to meet the person. I wanted to pick her brain for every joy and heartbreak she sustained as a military wife with a full family. I am glad she will be attending the ECW Conference in April so I will have three days to chat with and learn from her. My husband and I would like to have a family some day, but he was deployed to Afghanistan one month after we wed. I have so much to learn, but now I know as a military spouse I am never alone. In the wee hours of the morning, I can pick up one of Vicki’s books and know someone is with me in this.
Emerald Coast Writers Inc. www.emeraldcoastwriters.org/
Vicki Hinze www.vickihinze.com/

April 29, 2010 at 7:16 am

Athena’s birth: to the ER, Stat!

It all started about 9 pm last night. The tension was building in the back of my skull, like a ring from ear to ear along my hairline. As time went on it continued to move along my head and then bang around to different spots on my skull.

Now, I have had these before. But this was something altogether unreal. I took an RX I have for it. Nothing, so, as per directions, I took the second dose two hours later. It was getting worse with each passing moment. This thing was too much for my heavy duty rx.

Athena. That is it! This is what Zeus felt when she was brandishing her weapons, fully clothed in Battle Armour ready to burst forth from his split skull. Minerva, how could you? Hephaestus, where are you when I need you?!

11pm. The tears start to well. I am really sick of this. I break down when I can hear my mother’s voice like a bubble above my head advising me to drink some chamomile tea. I make it, a mixed brew for night time. It is soothing. So now I am fully exhausted, welcoming sleep and the pain is intensifying.

Back and forth from the bed to the couch, I change clothes a million times and adjust the air conditioning to see if warmer or colder would be better. Lights on, lights off. Music on, music off.
Insomnia. I start to clean the room I had earlier torn apart. If I am going to up with insomnia and I am going to make it do my bidding.

The nausea comes on. I hear my friends voice saying she was just praying to die with the horrible case of the belly big she had just gotten over. Maybe that is what I have? Nope, migraine. I have no lower “belly” issues but the overwhelming need to vomit the void in my empty stomach.
I send off a brief email to work explaining about the migraine making me ill and I might not be into work as I haven’t slept all night.

Tears and whimpering come on around 2am and last for two hours. It’s so bad I can’t see anymore and want to pass out. I have been debating going to the Base ER for a few hours now, but what could they do? Like a cold, oh its a headache, nothing here, go back home and suffer…?

Well, finally about 4am I can no longer take it and I just need someone to be around me. I was trying to hold out until the offices might open for the reg dr on base. MIGHT being the operative word. I was supposed to get a call from someone on Monday, so maybe, just maybe… It was just too much for me. Luckily, no one is waiting and it seems really, really quiet. I get in and am so exhausted and in pain I realize I have no idea how I got there. Obviously I drove myself, ID shown at the gate and parked. But I was so preoccupied with the pain none of it had registered in my short term memory.
The situation explained, my bp is way up to 150, not the usual 120. Not surprised. The Dr comes in eventually and I explain it all, show him the rx I took. Yup, I brought it, and I even highlighted the important areas on the info sheet folded inside. -Yes, I do read them! You should to! I explained how I was afraid bc another of my Rxs listed on there can negatively affect and be affected. ER DR had never even heard of my drug, “must be pretty potent stuff if I haven’t heard of it here…”

“Well it’s crap” was my retort, more to myself than to him, as tossed it into my bag. Dr explains that although my dr said not to take anything else with it, I could have in fact taken more pain killers. Great. But he finished with not all drugs work for everyone or on all receptors. This I already knew.
Since I had to drive myself the available options were limited to two. As it was presented to me, the ones which would have worked best would require a driver for me. Yay, deployments! I wanted to scream I AM ALONE! HE IS DEPLOYED AND THERE IS NO ONE TO DRIVE ME AT THIS HOUR OR I WOULD NOT HAVE DRIVEN MYSELF IF IT WAS THIS BAD! The options include a pill which may or may not work based on the effectiveness of my Rx for this particular migraine, or a shot in the bum of a regular painkiller. His suggestion was the shot bc it was more guaranteed. I took it.

The pain! The needle stick was rather squintee as it was a thicker gauged needle,I felt my face pucker. But it was not the worst needle I have had to endure. Then the contents spreads out. A long list of profanities I did not realize I was capable of came out of my mouth. The Pain! Pain for Pain! The irony! I stood there poised over the bed for a bit and then suddenly it was all gone, except for the pain in my head. That was still as prevalent as ever. The relief of the liquid being absorbed into my muscle was amazing.

15 to 20 mins and it should start working. So I called my parents house on the drive home. I know they will pick up. Or I will keep calling until they do. The beauty of house phones. 530 am. 630 am there. Dad was up. He was up two hours ago when I was pulling into and out of my parking spot debating if a trip over to the ER was worth it or just a stupid waste of more painful time. Oh well.
So he talked to me over the course of the drive home. He mentioned I could have called a cab. That had never occurred to me. Even though I see a cab every day, living a few places down from me. But I would have had to call it, drop me off, pick me up. With the pain I was in, I hadn’t even thought of that and may not have even been capable of those instructions.

I was able to go to sleep a while after I got home. My glorious, long awaited respite was interrupted twice. My work cell called and I groggily got up to answer it. It wasn’t the ringer of the phone in the mountain sandbox, but it might just be. I missed it and didn’t recognize the number. No message. Blissfully passed out again the number calls, again. This time I answer it to find a very courteous man explaining he dialed the wrong area code. Same number. I was in such need of sleep that I was able to shut out any further noise once my head hit the pillow and my arms curled around my over sized bear under the covers.

I woke around 9 am and made an apt to get something that works. No more ER trips for me! Forget that! At least I did not have to pay for any of it. I can’t wait for you to be home! When does this ever happen? When you are not around… figures.

June 8, 2010 at 6:06 am

Eglin Vet For Our Pets

Eglin Vet for our pets

Not credited but printed with my permission
Published in the February/March 2011 issue of the Military Voice & Community News
Our pets are our families. While some would rather favor one over the other, they have nevertheless helped us relax and exercise through countless moves, holidays, and deployments. But where to get the best care of them?
Look no further than the Eglin veterinarian at the 96 Force Support Squadron Army Veterinarian Treatment Facility. While its primary mission is to take care of the Eglin and Hurlburt working dogs, the clinic is also open to our best friends. They do not offer bathing or nail clipping, but care for pets of active duty and retired military personnel include rabies vaccinations, outpatient treatment, heartworm checks, and general immunization.
If you are worried about moving or have a roving cat or dog, the Eglin pet Vet offers an affordable HomeAgain microchip implantation system and American Kennel Club Companion Animal Recovery (AKC CAR) database enrollment.
Interested? Pets are seen by appointment only at Building 888. Eglin Vet hours are 7:15 am to 3:00 pm Monday through Friday, closed federal holidays, and can be reached at 882-8250 or 882-2233. This is not an emergency facility but you can find the number for the Emergency Veterinary Clinic, which is 850-729-3335. For more information on the AKC CAR program, visit http://www.akccar.org/about/profile.cfm.

Spouse to Spouse: Key Spouse Program

Key Spouse Program

Spouse to Spouse: Key Spouse Program

By Christina M. Callisto Free Lance Writer

Published in the October/November 2010 issue of the Military Voice & Community News

“Welcome to the Air Force family! Someone will contact you shortly.”
This is what the Key Spouse is for. A welcome to a new life style, a new location, a new mission.
“Someone will contact you while your spouse is deployed.”
The Key Spouse Program is the Commander’s program to specifically address concerns and needs of the dependents of Airmen throughout the Air Force. It’s the official communication network for spouses: official selection of volunteers, official oversight, and feedback right to the Commander. Military personnel have a First Sergeant to go to. Key Spouses are there to help you to get to what you need, help you to understand, and help you and your family through each phase of deployment and PCSing. They want to make sure you know all there is and have smooth transitions through military life.
Deployment is where Key Spouses shine. Some people have only work, others have kids, many juggle both. Each situation has its own needs. Perhaps you are also in the military. Who can you talk to? Who will listen to your troubles or help break up the loneliness when a spouse is remote? Are others experiencing what you or your kids are going through? Where can you share great news and funny pictures? Have a “grievance?” Keys work with you and the chain of command or necessary base agency. They will be your eyes, ears, and speak up for you.
When your Airman is deployed, the Key is there so you have someone for each of these questions and more. You may only need them once or twice during a military career or each and every deployment. The Key Spouse(s) will call periodically until homecoming to see how you are and if you need anything. Be honest. Let them know your stresses and joys, share how your children are handling the separation. Set up a schedule for contact (each week or every other) and the method (phone call, email, website, etc.). It truly helps the days and weeks pass by so much faster when you have a “hello” to look forward to every once in a while.
You do not need to deal with the anxiety or fear that may crop up by yourself. Face to face, email, phone, text, and social websites are just a few ways you can choose to be contacted and to make contact.
Depending on the size and need of the squadron or group, the number of Keys varies. Key Spouses can be husbands or wives, civilian, active duty or retired, enlisted or officer. They care for us so our spouses focus on the mission with the knowledge that the family is safe and looked after at all times. The Airman and Family Readiness Center (A&FRC) can put you in touch with your Key Spouse(s).
“As a dependent, who can I ask?” As an official unit representative Key Spouses are conduits of information. Passing along base and squadron updates, programs, resources, and contact numbers, fact support is the obvious part of the job. But the emotional and social support is greatly needed and often goes untold and unknown. This is what we as spouses need the most: the open door policy with peace of mind. Keys are available but they are not taxis, babysitters, or councelors.
As with life in general, what you put in to it is what you get out of it. Take advantage of everything that is offered to you and your family by the base, the squadron, and the Airman and Family Readiness Center. And keep going back. Let them know what you think, what you liked, what isn’t working, what you need and what you want to see more of. Remember, this is all for you and your family.